Daily situations that give ideas to mediate between brothers
These are some everyday situations that occur as a family when we have teenage children and they fight among themselves. How should parents react? Here we give some examples that can give us ideas.
Mediate between siblings: what to do and how to do it?
When we fight, we are assailed by many doubts about how to react to certain situations of jealousy or rivalry that may occur between your children. We want to put a dose of wisdom, calm or serenity ... to avoid discussion and, above all, so that a situation like this does not happen again, but we do not know how to react.
Here you have a series of examples of everyday situations that can suggest some idea for your specific case and that can help you foster a good relationship between siblings.
TWO SISTERS (one of 17 years and another of 15)
"My little sister is prettier than me, she has a better type, she is more popular with boys, she is a little girl, I can not stand her" (or the other way around, that the little girl is envious of the older one).
"Child, the value of a person is not measured only by the physical, you have to look at many other things such as intelligence, kindness, sympathy, kindness, you are only looking at the physical aspect and the person is more than You have a lot of qualities, look what a lovely smile you have, and those eyes are so ripped in. Also, there are many beautiful women who have not found the man of their lives and if you think your sister is the "chulita", we should tell him with affection, because the "chulitas" in the long run, do not like anything ... "
TWO BROTHERS (of the same or opposite sex)
"My brother does not study anything and gets outstanding, but I spend my life studying and it's hard for me to get to the remarkable one, I can not stand it, I'm not going to study either."
"Son, you have to learn to look a lot further, even if it costs you now, but maybe you do not realize the value of effort, of will, of perseverance, but if you cultivate all virtues, you will get very far in your Studies and your professional work Do not just look at the most immediate notes Experience shows us that intelligence alone is not enough You get better results if you put effort and tenacity, so do not worry and keep trying ".
TWO BROTHERS (of the same or opposite sex)
"You always count on him for everything, and with me for nothing, I am no longer a child, although my brother is older than I. I am also capable of many things".
Probably, the son is right and the parents have not realized that they are treating the little brother as if he were "the little one". It happens quite often, it is loaded too much on the older and much distrust of the smallest, although it really is not so much. "In what things do you think I do not count on you? Do you think I'm treating you like the little one? Well, maybe, son, you're right and I have not realized."
SISTER-BROTHER
"Of course dad (or mom) as is your little son-daughter of the soul, you overlook more certain things that you demand from me twice, it's your favorite".
There are (or should not be) preferred children. If there are, the fault lies with the parents. To put a little objectivity in this matter, we can keep a written control of the situations, in order to check if we can really talk about preferences. "Son, in what things do you think I demand more from you than your brother, and I overlook certain things? Maybe I have not noticed, or maybe you exaggerate, but to prove it we will write these situations that you you detect. "
TWO BROTHERS OR SISTERS
"I know that I am not like my sister / brother, he / she is perfect and I am more costly for things, you do not value me at all".
Each child is different. In the family, each member is valued for what they are, not for what they have or do. Beware of the self-esteem of this child. I'm probably having a hard time. Not feeling valued by your own parents can be very hard. The solution is to reconsider our treatment, if we punish him a lot, if we do not overlook him or one, if we always look at what he does wrong, if on the contrary we do not highlight his positive actions etc.
Pilar Guembre. Pedagogue
Carlos Goñi. Professor of philosophy
