Communicate with your partner: keys not to break in summer

Summer can mean the deterioration of relationships if holiday expectations are not as idyllic and perfect as they had imagined.

With the summer period begins a stage, sometimes, truly relevant for many couples, who see in the summer holidays a moment of coexistence and personal dedication. But this period can also result in a deterioration of the relationship, either due to the non-fulfillment of expectations, sometimes too high or, simply, for not being able to combine both individual personalities with life in common. As Carlos Rodríguez, psychologist of the Vithas Nisa Pardo de Aravaca Hospital, organizing vacations together is a time of union for many couples, helps to find common ground, harmonizes tastes and interests of both and creates paradisiacal expectations that are taken out of the daily routine. "The problem comes when the expectations of this holiday activity are too high, any new experience we experience is qualified in one way or another according to our previous impressions and perspectives, which we have been building for months. music, often a criticism or recommendation too positive can generate an interest that in reality then does not reach to be reached, "says the specialist. With the holidays something similar happens. A hard winter of work and little contact can lead to a perception of the excessively wonderful summer and, with it, in an increasingly high risk of disappointment. Create realistic expectations is the best recommendation to enjoy without being overwhelmed by circumstances and happily accept the possibility that not everything goes as planned. Main aspects that strengthen the relationship: 1. A good communication, indispensable: Carlos Rodriguez points out that in the couple always follow certain rules of mutual respect that allow yield and expose the arguments of each without generating banal discussions that do not lead to any port. "We have to find common ground , whether to organize or enjoy vacations together, as for matters of greater relevance and future transcendence As linguistic beings we must give value to the power of language to allow things to happen. " Conversing in a fluent way, listening to double what is spoken and expressing ideas, opinions and, above all, discomforts is a good way to correct errors, change attitudes and favor the good atmosphere during coexistence.2. Avoid judgments, which always say more of what they do than who they are from, and that genuinely reflect the human soul. Performing judgments as a lesson turns arguments into indisputable and inflexible facts, in the face of a dissenting but totally respectable opinion. The psychologist adds that "Expressions like 'Your father is unbearable' can be replaced by 'In my opinion I think your father is unbearable', so we move from fact to opinion." 3. To look for a plan of life in common that allows to look at long term, but without stopping concentrating in the day to day. Two people who love and appreciate each other must always have dreams in sight, projects to do and trips to make, together and separately, and in both cases show support and affection. Summer can be a good time to lay the foundations of this future plan and start a healthy and happy coexistence.4. Keep affective exchanges alive, and not only when we refer to sex. The compliments at unexpected moments keep the fun, the romp and the pleasure of being together, feeling loved and valued by someone.5. The activities in common, programmed with time and in an exciting way, such as summer vacations, create a plan to make the most of every moment together, always maintaining a respect for the individual space of each one.


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