Education requires time: children need our patience
Educating is a task that demands time. As in the ascent to a mountain, sometimes you have to stop, force the march ... or retrace your steps because the path ends in a precipice. However, the important thing is to reach the final goal: educate them as people with will and criteria, with autonomy and decision to face life. And this is not achieved in two days.
In this world of haste, speed and vertigo in which there is time for everything but quiet dialogue, serene reflection and the cultivation of peace of mind, calm and patience are increasingly necessary. Without a doubt one of the best gifts we can leave in inheritance to our children is the custom of inner balance and peace. They must see us serene, without giving way to anger or anger over trifles; They have to see that we do not take things out of the box ... Because the best way to deal with people is as calmly as possible.
You can also see how easy it is for children to adopt more serene behavior when they are facing a calm person, who does not respond with anger and violence but with a calm, friendly and conciliatory tone of voice. They need our patience, first, because in education there is no room for haste; second, to help them face difficulties with calmness and serenity.
Educate with time
What many children are missing is that their parents do not devote time. The boys are given to the person they love: They are very sensitive to affection. And although we love our children a lot, sometimes it happens that the children do not notice it because they think that they are only wanted in theory: "He says he loves me, but he never has time to explain this exercise well, he does not have time to leave Of chess".
We have to move on to practice, and they have to notice that we love them, earning them with our love, even if we occupy a time that we do not have at all. It is the best investment we can make. Affection can almost be measured by the hours of treatment. Although sometimes the so-called quality time is more effective, because half an hour alone with one of the children, at the right time, can help you more than spend an entire morning with him.
Educate with authority
Education does not mean harsh rules, imposed authority and long faces; but neither the opposite. The children must feel the authority, but no one can claim that he suffers a diminution of authority when little details are overlooked, with patience ... The tactical errors are less important than having a clear and well-defined strategy. We can afford to make small mistakes as long as we have clear ideas.
Children need our patience because it is the only way to reach their privacy; it takes time, friction and treatment. End up having fun and taking advantage of relaxed moments to make a breakthrough. Be interested in what interests the children. And since their world is usually very attractive, we will enjoy that discovery.
Winning your heart will be strong our advice; it is not enough just to have the prestige of parents or with respect and discipline: we must know how to attract the sympathy and affection of our children. And that means paying attention (with patience) to the flood of little things (very important for them) that count when they arrive from school, or that they want to tell us when we come back from work, generally tired.
Educate with understanding
It is necessary to understand. And if we understand him, he will tell us, and we can help him. That way they will lose the fear of making themselves known, so important to educate; You will see that sincerity and trust fix everything with admirable ease.
The first step, however, is to give it listening and dedicating time to your problems that, although they seem trifles, weigh like slabs for them. But if we move them aside because we are doing something important (watch TV, finish a report, rest or fix a closet), it will be harder and harder for them to tell us. Because of our little patience we are closing the doors to their privacy and the close adolescence will end up taking a few more locks.
Advice: James B. Stenson. Founder and director of the Northridge Preparatory School of Chicago (USA) and Consultant of the National Commission for the support of the Humanities of Washington, D.C.