The worries: what to do to stop worrying?
We have all experienced that feeling of not being able to get a thought out of our heads. It is something totally normal that happens to us often. To the fair extent, the worries They can help us face our day to day more effectively, but it is true that if the frequency, intensity or duration of the worries are too high, it will probably affect our lives. And that's when we have to start worrying.
What are the worries?
Any emotional state consists of three different response systems. The cognitive, the physiological and the behavioral. The concerns would appear in the cognitive response system. In general, concerns are often defined as repetitive and unproductive cognitive processes.
Generally, they occur when we are emotionally activated. Especially when we feel anxious, angry, scared or sad. Many investigations negatively relate the level of concern with the level of psychological well-being. The problem is that none teach us to manage this psychological process.
Why do we keep worrying continuously?
The emotional responses are always maintained by the contingencies that occur after the emotional event. The answers will be maintained if there is something that reinforces them.
That is, if every time we feel anxious we avoid the stimulus that this emotion generates, the momentary relief of anxiety, will reinforce the appearance of this emotion in similar situations.
In the case of concerns, exactly this happens. We are not worried all the time, but from time to time we get distracted or try to think of something else. These actions produce momentary relief, but reinforce the emergence of concerns.
What can we do to stop worrying?
In the end, worries are nothing more than cognitive responses to certain emotions. Our brain wants us to process this information. With our way of acting, what we do is precisely the opposite.
We do not process the information correctly, so our brain continues to assess such dangerous cognitions as dangerous. We do not give you the opportunity to prove that thoughts, in themselves, are not dangerous.
An alternative way of face the worries it is precisely to try not to fight against them, but to do exactly the opposite.
The hour of the worries
A good way to reduce the frequency, intensity and duration of the worries is to schedule every day a little while to worry about us.
It is normal for you to sound strange that, to stop worrying, you have to do exactly the opposite. But, even if you do not believe it, the attempts to suppress the thought of conscience that cause it is that they appear with more force.
Therefore, during fifteen minutes a day, it's a good idea that Write what worries you. Moreover, it is very useful to get in the worst. Describe the worst possible situation for a few minutes. In this way, we will be processing the situation appropriately.
Once described, we will describe the resources we would have in this situation. In this way, you will focus your attention on the solutions, not on the problem, which will generate a decrease in the intensity of the emotion.
In the end, the stress It arises when we perceive that we do not have the resources to face a situation with success. If we focus our attention on the perception of our own resources, the stress will be much lower.
The hour of the concerns can be carried out in different ways: you can write what worries you, speak up, imagine it or record it in audio and listen to it. The writing avoids possible distractions. If you decide to do this exercise, choose a moment free of distractions. Dedicate all your attention or otherwise it will not take effect.
Studies with emotional writing indicate that the first week that we perform the exercise there may be a rise in general anxiety, but after two or three weeks of practice the level of well-being rises significantly. Therefore, do not be scared if the first days you notice more worried than normal. It is part of the process.
Jesus Matos. Psychologist expert in management of sadness. Founder of the online platform In Mental Balance.
