When leaving school, is there anyone at home?
The bell of the end of the classes sounds and all the students throw themselves, in crazy race, towards the exit of the school. The time for snack, drawings, friends and homework comes. But in some cases, the perspective is not so attractive: after an exhausting day at school, only a vacant house awaits them. This can create not only psychological and affective problems, but also certain security risks.
TEXT: When you put the key in the lock you know that nobody is waiting for you. Some children have already accommodated themselves to this situation and it does not affect them at all, but others can try to combat loneliness in different ways. For example, rushing on television or on the video game console. Scarcely five minutes before their parents arrive, leave that entertainment to do their homework.
Others, without the vigilance of their parents, acquire the bad habit of staying in the street, instead of returning home as soon as possible. Quiz with the gang or maybe alone, but they wander from one place to another wasting their time and exposing themselves to many other dangers: inconvenient places like billiard halls and video games, people with bad intentions, ill-advised diversions ... Yes, shortly before his parents arrive, the house will have arrived, and no one can imagine the lack of security he had during the whole afternoon.
Our son does not act with malice: it takes a lot of willpower to go directly home instead of hanging around when nobody is waiting for them. The circumstances of each family are different and, in some cases, perhaps there is no more remedy than leaving the children alone. But, since you start school until about twelve years, you should not see this situation as normal; it is convenient that there is some movement monitoring.
Physical security occupies an important place among the parents' concern, but not only when walking on the street: also within the home itself. It does not have to happen, but with children alone at home it is easier for accidents to occur. Therefore, we must establish an action plan with the children: that they know what to do if they have an accident, what to call, what neighbor or family to go to and, if they have sufficient age and maturity, teach some first aid.
However, the psychological and affective problems that this situation may generate are more worrisome. In fact, boys and girls suffer especially from loneliness and boredom. This may cause them to eventually feel that they care little about their parents, even that they do not love them. That is why they solve it in their own way, hooking up to television or video games, that is, to which it entails less effort. Leave the homework at the last hour, because there is no one in front who demands or who is interested.
To alleviate this negative effect, when you get home (probably after a tiring day) you will have to leave your own professional problems hanging on the rack to turn over to your children and your spouse. Our son looks forward to telling us what he has done that day, to teach us an exam or a drawing ... With effort on our part, indeed, but our children have to verify that it is fulfilled in practice. who already know: "my parents love me".
Having someone to take care of the children until we get there can be the best solution, although it is probably not possible for all families. The ingenuity often supplements the lack of economic resources: there are several tricks and ideas that some families have put into practice to prevent a boy or a girl of these ages from being left alone. All this is aimed at achieving safety in the environment of the boy, to avoid external dangers.
In the first place, there are those who can afford an assistant who takes care of the children, waiting for them at school or at home, controlling their arrival time, where they play, when they do homework and study, etc. If you only come to help certain days a week, it can be matched with those afternoons when parents have more problems coming back soon.
Sometimes, this task can be entrusted to the grandparents or to a family member who lives more or less close. Even a neighbor of ours friend or a mother from the school with a home near us can help us. We can agree with her to divide the afternoons: one day she has a lot of kids at home and another is us. We can also have at home a trusted university student who lends and wants to earn some money.
The idea should be encouraged in children that there will always be someone waiting for them at home, even if they are not parents because they can not. In this way these problems are avoided. Afterwards, however, it is not so important that you spend the whole evening accompanied. If the child is responsible, the assistant, the family member, etc. You can leave quietly when we delay a little.
Another idea to keep our son occupied and safe some afternoons is to take advantage of extracurricular activities at school or in an academy or club near the school or home.Without imposing them or burdening the child with new classes, we can study the schedules and adjust them to ensure, although we do not witness it, that our son does not waste time over there. Above all, during those more difficult afternoons for us.
You can do sport, or something of art, or simply directed study, but with a clear idea: the importance of these activities lies in learning the knowledge more suited to your personality and we do not have to use them as "second nor * eras". Respecting this idea, we can rely on them to have our son controlled and delay us a bit more, just that afternoon he has judo, for example.
For the evenings that do not realize this type of activities, another idea can be that our son stays to play in the patio of the school with his friends until we arrive to pick him up. Inside the enclosure is more secure and safe from any danger. In some schools, there are also libraries to study, read or do homework, although at these ages it is not as attractive as sports.
A schedule and some duties
To help you live the order and so you do not waste time, our son should be clear about a schedule for the afternoon hours, after school. Whether there is someone caring for you or if you have signed up for an extracurricular activity, you should know what you have to do at all times: at what time snack, at what time you do your homework and study, at what time you can see the drawings or get to play.
One of the most important activities of the afternoon is the homework of the school, and they need to spend some time ... and also need to have their parents. There will be a lot of doubts and questions. Make better use of that time if we help you, making you think and realizing that you know more than you imagine. Some afternoons are not possible because of our work, but we will have to find some time at night to review the exercises with him and show him that we care very much about everything he has: even the map of Spain with the rivers and tributaries most important that you have drawn.