Smartphones, enemies of communication as a couple

How easy is life with new technologies: with a click we know the name of that author that we had forgotten, with another we know the last hour of international news and if we press again we will know what that friend does not see since adolescence. But are they really beneficial? The answer is "no", for some facets of our life as communication with a partner is absolutely not.

Although we have at our disposal all the information and new technologies as smartphones allow us to be connected 24 hours a day for seven of a week, in other cases takes out of our closest circles.

Less screen, more face to face

People can be informed at any time of the day thanks to the proliferation of the Internet connection and technologies such as smartphones. However, these screens make people forget about the world that exists around them, face-to-face talks and communication in couple.

Unfortunately, an increasingly common scene in homes is the two members of a couple looking at their electronic devices and even face to face they do not address the word. A context that becomes more ironic if you think you are communicating with other people but avoiding a conversation with that person with whom you share the day to day.

There are still no large studies that show a clear correlation between the time that couples spend looking at the screens of their mobile devices and marital dissatisfaction. However, an article from Pew Research called "Couples, internet and social media", in 2014, surveyed 2,250 adults to learn how these relationships coexisted with technology.

The results showed that while the 72% of the adult users of the network believed that the new technologies had no "no real effect" on their marriage, and 20% percent indicated they had negative consequences. On the other hand, a quarter of the respondents said that their partners were distracted with their smartphone when they were together, something that really bothered them.

Other obstacles to family communication

Not only smartphones hinder communication as a couple, many other devices and attitudes at home also put many obstacles:

- Televisions to those who sometimes attend more than the couple on certain occasions.

- Small customs that are transformed into annoying routines such as, for example, read the newspaper while having breakfast instead of talking.

- Do not attend to the entire message. Many times you prefer to express that you have already understood what you wanted to say, when the other person has not finished telling everything.

In these situations we must counteract with actions in favor of communication as a couple:

- To show affected.

- The active listening that traditional marriage therapy both recommends.

- Ask everything that comes to mind about the subject in question, with real interest. Find out what it is really about.

- Show that we are together before anything that is happening. We are from the same team.

- Always talk to respect, whatever the topic may be.

- Consider the ideas and feelings of the other when making decisions.

Damián Montero

Video: No Sex Marriage – Masturbation, Loneliness, Cheating and Shame | Maureen McGrath | TEDxStanleyPark

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