Learning to relate: ideas to socialize children

The family is the first place where the child is related, that is, socialize. Here, he learns the norms, habits and basic behaviors of coexistence necessary for his social maturity. Parents and siblings thus represent the first people with whom to develop this capacity.

Towards three years, two circumstances converge that expand the world of child relationships: on the one hand, a progressive abandonment of egocentricity with respect to the outside world; on the other, his incorporation to the school world, where you will discover your peers and expand your possibilities of relationship and communication.

Learning to relate while playing

In first of Infant Education, the need arises in the child to share their games and their time with other children, regulate their behavior in relation to others and take into account the wishes, needs and opinions of others. You will learn desirable norms, habits and behaviors in your relationships through the game.


In spite of everything, a child who has not attended the nursery before three years can have the same socialization, if their family environment has facilitated a relationship of communication, dialogue, participation, help and spirit of service and openness to others .

The communication from the beginning must be fluid, dynamic and affectionate; It is the stage in which the child creates very strong affective bonds with the people who take care of them, since these will be their attachment figures. By speaking to them, verbalizing what we are doing, stimulating them with words of affection and affection, we are contributing to their development of language and their capacity for communication, relationship and affection; In addition, we will develop their sensitivity and basic emotions for their subsequent social development.


Other effective measures are: take him to places of recreation and fun so that he gets used to interacting with other children; and, organize excursions with other families that have children of similar ages.

Way of relating with their equals

Up to three years old, the child shows a significant intellectual characteristic: he is the center and everything else must adapt to his thinking. The game of a child of 2 or 3 years is alone or in parallel with others; schooling will facilitate the relationship with their peers, to abandon their egocentricity (inability to take into account the point of view of others) and through the game will develop their socio-affective capacity.

By age 5 or 6, social relationships will be consolidated and the game will begin to be more stable, looking for friends to have fun, imagining and devising shared games or adopting certain roles.


Girls and boys do not relate equally

Both share common psycho-evolutionary characteristics in a given chronological time, although they differ in their maturational rhythm, their tastes for certain games and social roles. The rhythm of socializing development depends on the maturity level of each one.

The most significant difference between them is in the means and modes of socialization, because their games and the roles they imitate are different. A child looks more for the relationship through the gross motor movement, in which his whole body is involved: he likes to run, to go behind a ball or to play with other children, although there are always children who are more sedentary. The girl, however, normally communicates with the gesture and the word; he likes the symbolic game and assumes adult roles, usually imitating her mother or the teacher.

Both relate differently to their environment and to those around them, because they have different socio-affective tastes and needs. Each one assumes his social role by imitating an adult with whom he identifies himself as an equal. Learn to distinguish differences naturally and adopt their role, seeking in turn the company of those who recognize as equals.

Tips to promote the sociability of children

- Do not ever put him in evidence with negative comments like: "You are unfriendly", "How shy you are!". By labeling it we are giving feedback to your introversion and embarrassing you even more.

- Facilitate relationships, inviting his little friends home. Being "in your field" will feel more secure and strengthen your self-esteem.

- If necessary, sit the first days with him to play in the park, talk with the children and introduce your child to the conversation.

- Talk to him about how well he has had it, after an afternoon of play and what he liked the most.

- In case of conflict, take it naturally, do not distress. Then, at home, encourage him to tell what happened to him, why, how he feels and how we are going to solve it.Once we have listened to him it is necessary that we give him strategies to solve and know how to act in similar situations, even dramatizing the situation and teaching him how to behave.

- Do not insit in front of people if at that time you do not want to say hello. Try not to make negative comments about your behavior in public, just to get well in front of friends, because you will believe them and you will be reinforcing their negative behavior.

Ana Aznar
Advice: Malena Muñoz Garrosa

Video: Homeschool Socialization - How students are social w/o a classroom


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