How to educate in courage: a world for the brave
In the face of aggression or danger, it is normal to be afraid. For some, ghosts can provoke real terror; for others, a nighttime noise when you are alone at home can arouse many fears; and, for some, certain bugs like bats, with that vampire face, or spiders, so hairy, can paralyze them ... So, how to educate in courage?
To have fear is a basic condition of human nature and, therefore, normal. In fact, as the philosopher José Antonio Marina has shown, fear belongs to the defensive system of nature and is something that we share with many animals.
In these modern times, widespread fear has become the routine of daily life. We live in a world for the brave: the lack of citizen security, the abuses and robberies, the terrorist threat ... A newscast can serve as a catalog of the "possible" dangers that can end in nervousness, anguish and a wide variety of concerns (not to mention pathological cases, such as panic attacks, phobias or obsessive-compulsive disorders).
The value as opposed to fear
If we go to the Dictionary of the Royal Spanish Academy, we can read that the word "value", in its fourth meaning, is defined as "quality of mind that moves to undertake resolutely large companies and to face the dangers." Adolescence, it has always been said, is a time of great ideals, but also of great fears ... Fear of being bad, fear of not being popular, fear of not having friends, fear of pimples, fear of being excluded, fear of not growing, fear of growing too much, fear of change, fear of parents, fear of failing, etc.
How to educate in courage? 8 keys to educate
To educate in courage, we must put into play a series of skills, abilities and virtues such as those detailed below. It is not a complete catalog, but they can be of great help in the task of educating brave children:
1. Knowing how to identify one's fears. Many of them, unconscious or acquired in previous stages. But if it is hard for us to speak in public or to look in the eyes of people, it is better to know it than to be frustrated when they take us out in class or if they present us to someone of the other sex. To be brave is to know oneself, with the virtues and with the defects; in addition, only then can you cut them short.
2. Face your own fears. Sometimes, it's time to overcome a silly fear. That gratinated cauliflower that makes us return from just smelling it and that they serve us in our best friend's house, can turn into an authentic battle of Lepanto. If we win it, we will have grown as people to see that this fear was irrational.
3. Train yourself to bear the contradictions. Courage means strength; To pretend to reach the value without costing, is to pretend to play the electric guitar without practicing hours and hours. Caprices by system weaken our capacity for effort; the challenges, strengthen the will.
4. Security in itself. When anchors are safe (in the family, in friends, in God) it is very difficult to be afraid of anything. Not to that teacher who has taken us mania (what is the most that can happen, to suspend us?) Or to that end of the tennis championship of the institute (is the world over to lose a game?). It helps a lot to know how to give each thing the importance it deserves.
5. The boys: brave! In certain intellectual and cultural environments, there is an idea, born in feminist circles, that you have to try to feminize the child, in the sense of making him lose the bad that the man has (aggression, paternalism, etc.). They are theories that do not take into account the nature of the person and the differences between boys and girls. That a boy tries to be more affective and social, that takes into account his personal appearance, does not mean that he does not show courage, that he is not protective, daring, curious, etc.
6. The girls? As well. Everything said in the previous point can be said about the girls. Courage does not understand the sexes.
7. Prudence. Prudence is the virtue that helps us to decide the best option among several possible ones. It is a virtue that leads to action. Before a rabid dog that gets in our way, the options arise: "I get into the container", "I use the backpack as a weapon", "I run away" * A prudent person, is not the one who stops waiting for the situation will fix itself.
8. Clear principles. You are afraid, but you act as you should act and so, defends that friend who is being beaten although suppose to take a black eye home.
The courage, ideas to reflect
1. A great example of courage is knowing how to go against the current, When the environment around is not home with your own convictions.Saying "no" to porros or pastis, approving studying instead of the law of minimum effort, being loyal to friends *, are behaviors that show great courage.
2. There are times when courage is seen as a more masculine virtue and the boy is required not to be a coward, etc., while the girls are spoiled and even more feminine fears are funny. Respecting differences, courage is a virtue of equal value to boys as girls.
3. Many teenagers see alcohol and at the end of the week, a way out of that insecurity typical of age; With alcohol everything is better, they dare to talk with that girl or that boy, they forget their fears ... But it is an artificial way of altering the personality that has many negative effects.
4. Beware of the imagination. It makes us invent fears, because precisely its function is to invent. We must know how to control it so that it is at our service, specifically, not giving situations more than the necessary.
5. Stop the so-called pathological fears, Maybe it is a task for a psychologist, but the normal fears that we all develop, we are able to overcome them with our willpower, with a balanced personality and with the help of the people who love us.
As for there to be a victory there must be a fight, and for this an opponent is necessary, maybe it is a good idea to make a list of our biggest fears, qualifying them as more or less important. The fear of spiders can be very striking, but perhaps not so important. The fear of giving our opinion, however, is something that can weigh on our personality. It would also be positive to ask a good friend to tell us what you think our fears are.