Non-verbal communication: the secrets of what we do not say

Communicating means letting others know what we think, feel, desire, etc. We can communicate in many ways, perhaps the most widespread is through verbal or written language, however it is proven that more than 65% of the information we transmit comes from non-verbal communication, that is, through gestures, postures, look, appearance ...

From small they teach us to speak, write, read ... but they do not teach us to interpret the expressions and gestures of other people despite all the information we transmit with them. Being like this ... how can I know what I am saying with my body? How influences nonverbal communication in my message?

What is nonverbal communication?

Non-verbal communication is based on all the messages that we transmit through our body, the way of speaking we have, the gestures we make or the positions we adopt ... everything as a whole is transmitting information about ourselves, about how we feel or think.

So, through the non-verbal communication we can even contradict ourselves, since we can be saying something with verbal language, while our body with non-verbal language is transmitting the opposite.

The secrets of non-verbal communication

Knowing how we communicate through the body has many advantages. The movements that we make with our body help us to give strength to the message, to make a better impression, it contributes credibility and therefore generates more confidence in your interlocutor.

But the Non-verbal communication is a double-edged sword and it can play tricks on us, since it is not so easy to control some spontaneous movements of the body when we are talking or exposing a message.

For this reason, there are many specialists who analyze every microgame of politicians or public figures in search of what can reaffirm or deny their message. Knowing what it means, when we are listening or talking, opening our hands, touching our nose, tilting our heads or looking to one side is fundamental to interpreting what we really say or are saying.

What do we say with the body when ...?

When we communicate, different elements of our body come into play that we must know and take into account if we want our message to be as effective as possible. In essence, it is what we want to say and we do not say. Some of the secrets of nonverbal communication are:

1. The gestures of the face. Through the gestures of the face we transmit information about our emotions and feelings, for example, if someone touches or covers his mouth it can be a sign that he is hiding something, touching his nose can indicate that they are lying or scratching his neck can mean doubt about what is being said.

2. Position of the head. The different positions help us to understand what the real intentions of the person are, if you want to please, help ... if for example we bend our head when listening we increase the confidence of the interlocutor towards us or support the chin on the hand with the open palm It can be a sign of boredom.

3. The look. When we hold a conversation, the usual thing is to look into the eyes, if the pupils dilate is that we are seeing something that we like. Raising the eyebrows is a sign of absence of fear and looking to the sides is an indicator of boredom, we look for something else to pay attention to.

4. Position of the arms. The arms help us to support the message, but also to protect us. For example, crossing the arms indicates rejection, crossing one arm in front to hold the other can be a sign of lack of self-confidence, while joining hands behind shows confidence and absence of fear.

5. Gestures of the hands. Gestualization is very close to speech, in doing so we can improve our verbal capacity. If in a conversation we have our hands in our pockets denotes pasotism, if we show the palms we show sincerity, if we join the tips of the fingers we are showing confidence and confidence and if we put them on the hips we express aggressiveness.

Rocío Navarro Psychologist Director of Psicolari, integral psychology

Video: Non-Verbal Communication | Leyla Tacconi | TEDxBritishSchoolofBrussels

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