Discipline: how to promote self-discipline in children?
The most appropriate method to promote self-discipline in children it is the method of natural and logical consequences. Basically it means that the child chooses one among several alternatives, and experiences, that is, feels the consequence of his choice.
Natural consequence to promote self-discipline It is all that allows us to learn what will happen naturally if we have certain behaviors. For example, if I tell my children that they have to brush their teeth every day because if they are not big they will get a lot of tooth decay, and they will have to go to the dentist, the preschool child can not understand very well something that will probably happen when he is old, the choice is obvious.
There are natural consequences that we can not use in our children and that is why we have to collect a logical consequence, here and now: "If you want to be in the classroom, it is without a ball, if you do not pay attention to me, I'll take it from you". That's telling you once to encourage discipline. Of course, the first thing he's going to do is continue playing the ball, because if it's the first time we tell him, he's going to prove how far we've come.
Once he did it to challenge us or frankly pull to break something, what we do is take the ball away. As we are not going to remove it forever, whenever we put the limit we have to give it a term. This will encourage discipline in children.
Tips to educate children in self-discipline
1. Remember that setting appropriate limits is not incompatible with affection. We must be firm before the norms that our children must fulfill for their own good and for the good of others, but impose them with understanding and love.
2. Set limits without explaining why it can lead to a manifest rebellion in adolescence. At these ages they will be silent, but later they will rebel. That's why, whenever I tell you why you can not do that, you have to explain it to him until he assumes it.
3. When our children make us too nervous and we no longer know what to do, ("I told you an hour ago to keep your clothes") remember that physical punishment never educates, simply relieves tension. If we observe that we want to give him a cake, it is better that we force him to lock himself in his room and wait until both of you, he and you, are more relaxed.
4. Lack of respect and answers It is one of the limits that you should always put. It is not about that you do not support that contradicts you. It is about internalizing that you should address yourself with education and respect, which is a consequence of love. And talk to your son / daughter about this matter, and if he does not comply, he should retire to his room and not leave it, until he is able to apologize and speak with respect to the same audience (brothers, seniors ) before which you lacked respect. Afterwards, you can talk about your differences.