The syndrome of affective deprivation in children
In modern society it is becoming more frequent leave children alonenot only physically, but also leave them alone emotionally. There are many children who do not perceive the affection of their attachment figures, there are many children who develop a empty excitesl, which results in lack of affective syndrome and it can have serious consequences in your future affective relationships and relationships.
The human being needs to develop affective bonds for their well-being and healthy development. The childhood is the period where the bases of all the development take place, also of the affective development. Children need to establish emotional bonds, and above all, they need to feel loved. For parents it is not just about being with them, sometimes, presence is not enough, it is necessary contact, affection, participation through the game ...
The syndrome of emotional deprivation
The lack of affective syndrome it can be defined as that psychological maladjustment produced when the child suffers an affective deprivation, being the necessary affections in a stage of its development.
The emotional vacuum is the consequence of affective lack syndrome. Those who suffer from it define it as a feeling that something is missing, that nothing fills them, discomfort, a sense of loneliness, etc. It is an emotional void, caused by an emotional need, an affective need not covered in childhood that causes this void and that need to satisfy the need.
When and how does the syndrome of affective deprivation occur?
All people need affection, feel affection and feel loved. This need for affection is more significant in childhood, since it is at this stage that we develop our attachment style (safe or insecure) that manifests itself in attachment patterns, which include: Behaviors, attitudes, and interpretations of love and attachment the relationships.
Both the style and the pattern of attachment develop within the relationship with the attachment figures, which are the closest figures. Two situations can occur:
1. What are you figures respond to the affective needs develops a safe and healthy attachment style. The safe and healthy attachment style is characterized by a security in the affection that the people close to us have, and gives rise to trust in the affection of the other person.
2. What, on the contrary, does not respond to affective needs, giving rise to an insecure pattern. The insecure attachment style is characterized by a lack of confidence in the attachment of others, and therefore there is dependency, anxiety, etc ... and an emotional vacuum that will tend to fill in other ways.
Consequences of the syndrome of emotional deprivation in children
The syndrome of emotional deprivation can have serious consequences in children. The lack of affection, of affection, of the parents' love towards their sons or daughters, supposes an affective deprivation, and the consequent development of an insecure attachment style, the affective need remains uncovered and the emotional vacuum appears. All this can and usually entails:
- Hostility, indifference or rejection I did the attachment figures, I made the emotional bonds.
- Dependence, anxiety and jealousy, in their emotional relationships.
- Dissatisfaction and need that they show love and accept them constantly.
- Psychological and social maladjustment in children. They will need to respond to this mismatch and find balance.
- Search for other ways to fill that gap: substance use, self-destructive behavior, shopping, drugs, sex, robberies, etc.
Tips to avoid the syndrome of emotional deprivation
Nowadays children are used to spending a lot of time alone. The demands of day to day, overloaded schedules of all, small and adults, makes life difficult in family and often neglect the necessary care links. It is very important to be aware of this reality and act to avoid possible negative consequences.
1. It is essential that the child is perceived as loved. Sometimes we can take it for granted that we love them and that is enough, but the most important thing is that they perceive that affection that they realize.
2. It is not about quantity of time, but quality of it. Even if we have many hours of work, we can always find a way to show that we are watching: eat together, call by phone, do something on the weekend, etc.
3. Try to make your time at home and in the family, Do not limit yourself to each one being with your Tablet or your TV, all separately entertained with your things. Spending time, together is necessary and fundamental.
4. Communication, habla with them, and pay attention to the things in your life.Know who your friends are, how your day has gone, what has happened to them, etc.
5. Respond when they need something. Sometimes they do not need us 24 hours, but they do need a hug when they are sad, attention when they are worried, etc.
Celia Rodríguez Ruiz. Clinical health psychologist. Specialist in pedagogy and child and youth psychology. Director of Educa and Learn. Author of the collection Stimulate Reading and Writing Processes.