12 ideas that help you educate children

Education is a science and an art. An art because there are no fixed rules and each case is different, each circumstance is unique, because people are unrepeatable. But, in turn, it is a science and as such it is necessary to know it, study it and dedicate hours of work. Nobody is born knowing and today the experience inherited from our parents in the area of ​​education is not enough. With these 12 ideas that help educate children it would be easier.

12 tips to educate children

1. Children do what you do
Our children observe us to obtain the keys of how to behave in the world, we are their model to imitate. For this reason, we must use our own behavior to guide them. What we do is often much more important than we imagine. If we want our child to say "please", we must say it first. If we do not want you to raise your voice, we must also maintain a reasonable tone of voice.


2. Keep the promises
When we make promises, whether they are good or bad, our children learn to trust us and respect us. So, when we promise to go for a walk after he picks up his toys, we'll have to be ready to leave the house, as soon as he's done with his obligation. When we warn you that we will leave the library if you do not stop running through the corridors, we will be ready to leave immediately if you continue to behave like that. There is no need to mount a scandal.

3. Get down to your level
Kneeling or crouching near children is a very powerful tool to communicate positively with them. Being close to them allows us to refine what they should be feeling or thinking. In addition, it helps them focus on what we say or ask them. If we get close and get their attention, it will not be necessary to have them look at us.


4. Listen carefully
Active listening is another tool to help young children cope with their emotions. They tend to be frustrated, especially if they can not express themselves well enough for us to understand them. So, when we repeat what they tell us and what we think, we help them relieve some of their tension and make them feel respected and consoled. This can prevent many tantrums of potential character.

5. Surprise him by behaving well
When our child behaves as we expect from him, we can give him a great positive response. For example, "How happy I am, you are behaving but very well!". "How I like when you keep all the toys after playing!" This attitude works better than "waiting" for the time to go to the streets and scold him for leaving everything messy. This positive response is sometimes called descriptive praise. A good purpose is to make six positive comments (praise and encourage), for each negative comment (criticism and rebuke). It is good to remember that children seek negative attention, if it is the only alternative for you to pay attention to.


6. Choose wisely the battles
Before intervening in something your child is doing, ask yourself first if it is really necessary. By giving instructions and negative responses only when they are strictly necessary, you create fewer opportunities for conflict and bad feelings. Rules are important, but you have to reserve them for important things.

7. Make it simple and simple
You must give clear instructions in simple terms, so that your child knows what is expected of him. For example, "Please, do not let go of my hand when we cross the street."

8. Responsibility and consequences
As children get older, it is good to hold them accountable for their own behavior, giving them the chance to experience the natural consequences of their behavior. We can not be constantly the bad guys in the movie. For example, if you forgot to put the lunch box in your backpack, at lunch time you will go hungry, once, because the next one will worry about taking it. Sometimes, with the best intentions, we do too much for our children and do not allow them to learn for themselves. At other times, we will have to make them see the consequences of unacceptable behavior, making sure that we have explained the consequences and that they have understood them.

9. Say it once and keep going
The can is boring for parents and it does not work. We must avoid idle threats, because they will end up being ignored. The best way is to tell them things only once and only intervene if later you need to establish limits or hold a rule.

10. Make him feel important
Children love being able to contribute to the family. You can start by assigning them some easy tasks or things they can do to play an important role in helping with household chores. This will make them feel important and proud to lend a hand. They also help them feel responsible and raise their self-esteem.

11. Anticipate possible conflicts
Sometimes, we can not attend our children as we would like or we can not accompany them on any important occasion for them, due to circumstances beyond our control (a business trip). In these cases, it is good to foresee in advance these delicate situations to plan the needs of your child and explain why we need your understanding and collaboration. In this way, they will be prepared for what we expect from them at that moment.

12. Maintain a sense of humor
Another way to reduce tension and possible conflicts is to use humor. You have to become the threatening monster to tickle or make animal noises, in situations that require it. However, you should not use humor in their defects, because it does not help them at all. Children are greatly hurt by parental taunts. With the jokes you have to laugh all.

Keys to reflect on family education

- It is very good to help the children to strengthen their positive attitudes. Praise good acts, encourage them to repeat them.
- Habits are best acquired through "repeated free acts with effort". That is, consciously and loved by whoever makes them.
- If we educate with rewards and punishments, watching them or with authoritarian attitudes, the children will not act with freedom, but mediated.
- Help your children to be athletes and you will avoid many problems in adolescence. It is very good if you can match any of your hobbies.

A good start to implement all these ideas, is that you sit together to consider whether the way to educate your children corresponds to an education that promotes habits and virtues or, on the contrary, material rewards, punishments, surveillance and imposed rules. These must exist, but it is better that they be accepted freely. Choose an idea or two of the ones we propose above and get down to work!

Fernando Corominas. Author of Educar Hoy, from Editorial Palabra.

Video: Teaching English to Kids in 5 Fun Steps


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