How to act in front of aggressive children
Do our children exhibit aggressive behaviors? And we parents, how do we guide them in this regard? If we have a "little fierce" at home, you will be interested in knowing how to act in front of aggressive children. To put a stop to the aggressiveness of our son, we will have to launch a small "shock plan".
With theseguidelines and tips you'll learnhow to act in front of aggressive children and in this way redirect that aggressiveness.
First, if he bit someone (a brother, for example), we will proceed to heal the wound. The first thing is to attend to the "victim". Afterwards, it will be convenient for the "aggressor" let's explain calmly that what he has done is not right. What we should never do is punish the child with threats or beat him for his aggressive behavior. If we did, we would be sending contradictory messages: Hitting is wrong, but I give you three lashes for misbehaving.
More alternatives for parents and children
Precisely for this reason, we must try other alternatives. One of them is to try isolate him when he shows aggressive. We can tell you, for example, to stay in your room or in a corner of the garden or park for a long time. Thus, while bored without toys, you can think about how bad it has been. Another option is to try reinforce the contrary behavior praising him every time it is pleasant and correct with others.
If our son's aggressiveness only appears every time he wants to get a bauble, we must try to stand firm. No matter how much you cry or scream, no matter how much you throw yourself to the ground or kick, we must not give. When he is tired of shouting, we will make him see with affection that with that attitude he will not get anything.
Reasons that influence children's aggression
In the event that, despite our efforts, our son's behavior does not improve, it may be more convenient for us to analyze if there may be something in the family dynamics that does not work: a new little brother that makes him feel jealous, prolonged absences of dad and mom, images of television that affect him too much ... Regarding the latter, we must bear in mind that we can not leave children alone with television without knowing what they are seeing, nor that the cartoons are always "clean" of violence.
Finally, we would have to think if our son's attitude may have a genetic or hereditary origin, so we should consult with a specialist. Anyway, do not be anguished in a hurry. These are usually isolated cases, so we must consider other possibilities before overwhelming us unnecessarily thinking about this option.
Tips to help aggressive children
- To avoid that the aggressiveness of our son goes to more, it agrees that we put certain limits from the beginning. Phrases like "hitting is wrong" or "do not do it" repeated over and over again can be basic to understanding that your attitude is not correct.
- If we whip him when he misbehaves, it is likely that our son ends up doing the same by pure imitation. Avoid confusing him with contradictory messages. "Passing is wrong" and dad and mom either have to do it.
- It's one thing to scold him when he hits a child and another thing is to embarrass him in public. Every time we have to put "the points on the i's", we will try do it privately.
- When you have bitten or hit someone, we will say that what you have done is very wrong and we will scold you for it, but do not resort to such painful phrases like "I do not love you anymore, you're a bad boy". This attitude can cause a lot of insecurity and sadness in our son.
- Sometimes it is easy to foresee that a fight is about to start. In these cases, the best is try to distract him by changing the game or activity. Thus, it is most likely that he ends up forgetting the reason for his displeasure.
- A good way to fight against aggression is praise the contrary behavior. If we praise our son every time he behaves in a pleasant and correct way, it is sure that in order to make us happy he will try to behave better and better.
- When the child behaves in an aggressive way, it is important look for the cause. In most cases, once the reason is solved, the aggressiveness disappears.
- We must bear in mind that our son is beginning to acquire certain levels of autonomy. He wants to become independent little by little from his parents and this process is good for him. In order not to slow you down in your evolution, we must allow him to solve some of his confrontations, provided there is no real physical danger to him. In each case, we will wait a few seconds before acting. Maybe the brawl is nothing.