How to rebuild a relationship

Love is a universal feeling and a complex mechanism that works in different ways in each one of us. The couples that survive in time are those that have managed to create a bond capable of facing the difficulties that appear. Therefore, on the road to a satisfactory relationship we must learn to face all the problems that may arise.

5 steps to rebuild a relationship

1. Ask for forgiveness. It is not possible to begin to rebuild a relationship without asking for forgiveness for what has been done wrong. Wanting to rebuild a relationship without adopting an attitude of rectification is a complicated task. For this, the first thing to do is locate the problem, what has led the couple to a distance or an anger. Being realistic and sincere with the causes of the problem is essential to assume, fairly, the fault. Once the problem is located, a modification of the behavior is necessary, in addition to a commitment of transparency to be at the beginning of the forgiveness.


2. Empathize with the other. The next step is to join forces and apply them to the construction of the new relationship. For this, you have to be able to put yourself in the place of the other. Empathizing not only allows you to have a better perspective of the situation but also helps to understand the other and to forgive him if that were the case. In addition, restarting involves facing new conflicts for which a deeper knowledge of the other person is needed so as not to fall into the same faults.

3. Strengthen the links. There are many things that unite two people but, sometimes, the lack of time causes these links to be neglected, eventually falling into monotony. For this reason, another of the keys to achieving reconciliation is precisely to strengthen the bonds of the couple, remember what unites them and encourage all those practices that bring one closer to the other. Sharing hobbies such as cinema, theater or sports, will not only be an excuse to spend more time together, it will also be a way to find points of union and topics to talk about on a day-to-day basis.


4. Communicate. Communication is another key element in a relationship. Currently, most of the problems that arise in a relationship arise precisely from poor communication: a communication in which nothing is said or shared.

At the beginning of every relationship, communication is vital to know and decide whether or not to give an opportunity. At the moment of reconciliation, communication becomes again of vital importance as it will reconnect those two people who, in some way, had stopped understanding each other. It is important that the two people are able to express their feelings, thoughts and vision of the world through words and gestures, at the same time they put all their interest in knowing the feelings and thoughts of the other, making an effort to understand it better.

5. Forgive. Asking for forgiveness is a difficult task but so is forgiving. In this context we must differentiate between forgetting and forgiving. The first involves an act of the brain and the second requires an act of the heart. If you forget but you can not forgive, the possibility that resentment for that mistake again appears is obvious. Normally, in a discussion or with the appearance of new problems it tends to remember those things in which the other person had failed, and which were, supposedly, forgotten.


Therefore, to forgive, that is, to understand the other person, take charge of their mistake and give them the opportunity to redeem them, will be the last step so that the reconstruction of the relationship is possible.

Patricia Núñez de Arenas

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