Communication in the family

Family communication should be based on trust and not suspicion. We all must know how to act with empathy, which means putting ourselves in the place of the other both in the case of parents and children. And based on that family trust and that empathy, it is logical that each one maintains and defends their criteria.

Being clear that the family is a hierarchy of love, to finish with the recipe of communication in the family we must listen more and talk less, understand others and express ourselves with affection and affection.

Keys to family communication

Family communication is not always easy, due to lack of time, multiple obligations ... and in another order, due to the different ages of the children and their different maturity. Therefore, it is essential to dedicate as parents a time in which each of them is excluded. And also, follow these 8 recommendations:

1. A lot of patience. That does not mean that you consent to their bad ways and lack of respect and do not put limits. You are his parents. You must and you have a right.
2. Listen to him. It is vital. Understand and know what your child thinks about life, others, himself. After listening and understanding, give them criteria and guidelines thatHelp him grow and mature.
3. Do not enter into conflict with him. Tell him what you think about his behavior, about his friends, about his ideas. Force him to listen to you and reflect on what you have told him. Then, you can converse with respect.
4. Be interested in his life without questioning him. Sometimes it is difficult, but this is the line to follow. Put yourself in their place, you do not like your husband or your wife to "interrogate you" either. There is a difference.
5. Do not overturn your anxiety in him. It worries you that you let yourself be carried away by friendships, that you work badly, that you make bad grades, that you hurt yourself. Communicate with serenity, without "keeping it at bay" just in case. In that attitude, there are no limits.
6. Help him communicate his emotions. That he knows how you feel before a certain attitude of his, and that he tells you how he feels before a concrete fact, concern or decision of you as a father.
7. Do not vent on him. One thing is to transmit our emotions and concerns, and another to download with him. He is not qualified, for example, to face or listen to our problems with our husband or wife.
8. Respect your moments of intimacy. You look worried but do not want to tell you what happens. Do not overwhelm him. But let him know that he can count on you for whatever you need him.

He tells me a few things

Check if your attitude with him is always a response instead of help. If you find yourself in this position, it always helps to write on a paper, letter or mail what happens to one, in order to clearly express feelings, emotions and concerns. It may be good for you and your son too.

How can we communicate with the children?

Mother-daughter Mother son

- Connect with emotions. - Understand that lives more
- Not wanting to do what rationally
you did not do emotions.

- Do not pretend not to commit - Help, however

your own mistakes. express your emotions.

- Do not see yourself reflected in it. - Understand your isolation
but encourage him to
communicate your emotions.
- Avoid phrases you're the same
that I. - Connect with your activities.

- Not wanting to do it to your
image and likeness.

Father-daughter Father son
- Accept that she becomes a woman. - Connect with activities.
- Do not be afraid to talk about - From the activities,
all of life to connect with your interior and emotions.
his male vision.
- Force to talk about
All.
- Do not be afraid to express feelings.
- Communicate that you want it
protect, avoiding
keep it at bay.
- Understand your emotions
from his more practical vision.

Marta Casas.Bachelor in Pedagogy and Family Orienter of the Nagore Cabinet.

More information in the book: The 7 habits of highly effective families, by Stephen Covey.