Between neighbors: door-to-door manners
Like it or not, there are few who can afford to live without sharing the ladder. We can love them, hate them, ignore them, envy them ... but the fact is that there are the neighbor of the fifth, the wife of the janitor and the party that lives right above our floor. Since we come across them every day of the year, whatever happens, why not try to create among all an environment of respect and coexistence that makes life in common more pleasant?
Nobody doubts that it is better to have friends than enemies, and much more within the same building. But it's not just about power have a smile in the elevator, but to be able to dialogue and reach agreements in owner meetings without blood or insults, have someone you trust to water our plants during vacations, and even allow that, when a Sunday coincides on the stairs, it is natural to "hook" with one of our neighbors to go and take some strawberries together ...
Today for you...
And how? The only possible way to establish simply acceptable and good relations will be that of example.
Living in a neighborhood does not have to mean feeling cut out. Of course, we can not set up a party until 5.00 A.M. every week, but if with a special occasion we discussed it before to the immediate neighbors and we are willing to allow them to do the same thing again ... maybe it will not be so hard. You know: today for you, and tomorrow for me.
Common interests between neighbors
The first place where an appropriate tone will have to be printed will be the owner meetings, where clashes of interests are common and - if we do not take care - the sowing of quarrels between the assistants and, by extension, between their families.
In these meetings, besides fulfilling the order of the day, we should make a tactful effort in that no one forgets that we are all inhabitants of the building and, therefore, we have common interests.
Among all of us, we will have to decide what our priorities really are and distinguish what will not be ceded and what can be negotiated. At one time or another there will be those who may feel more prejudiced than the rest, in which case we can always propose an option that compensates them, or create a certain climate of gratitude towards their generosity and good nature.
Relations between neighbors: the importance of a good start
When we move to a building, we must present ourselves, at least, to the neighbors of our landing, to the president of the community and to the concierge. It is not about making a complete visit, but to call at a prudent hour, exchange greetings, offer us for the activities organized by the community and leave our phone.
If the new neighbor is another, and does not have this initiative, we will be waiting to "hunt" it in the portal and introduce ourselves as well.
Children are an excellent instrument to take these first steps of approach. A few carantoñas in the elevator, a kind question about the kid's age and inviting him to play with the children of the house can achieve the foundation of a great intervecinal friendship.
Details in the neighboring community
In addition, we will be serious in complying with our neighborhood obligations, such as taking out the trash at the time indicated -to avoid leaving bad smells in the building- and promptly pay attention to the expenses necessary for the conservation and maintenance of the dignity of the building.
There are another thousand details of our daily life that we can remember, such as avoiding shaking carpets and crumbs from the tablecloth in the window, or not hanging clothes dripping in the yard and waiting for them to drain first in the bathroom. Neither should we wear clothes that fade, or leave our floor in a robe, because we damage the image of the house, to the detriment of all neighbors. While the whole building is, in part, our home, until we pass the threshold of our floor we are not really in privacy. For this reason it is very rude and impolite to hold inappropriate conversations, postures and dresses in the common areas of the building.
In the garage, we will take care to use the place that corresponds to us, and leaving space so that the other vehicles can maneuver without anguish.
Another important issue is the decorum of the facade, which we will have to take care of, avoiding hanging clothes on their balconies or turning them into storage rooms for the public's eyes.
Here there is no one who lives: problems between neighbors
When the inevitable problems arise between neighbors, it will be when we should most seriously consider our purpose.
The first rule is to speak. Whatever happens, the solution will not be found gossiping with the rest of the neighbors or communicating with Tam-tam with the Rock forofa that lives above.
If we bother the volume of his music, we will have to tell him, in a serious tone but without recriminations. Using formulas such as "the walls are very thin ... I'm sorry ..." can help us soften the situation. Maybe I'll take it badly, and go back to the stubborn ones, but if we insist, maybe it will stop doing it.
Neither do we have to wait for them to get angry with us. If we want to do works, maybe we can arrange that the hammer blows do not start on Sunday at 8:00 in the morning. As for the parties, they always bother the neighbors -especially if they end up late-, but if before we had the caution to warn them, they are likely to feel grateful and not at all displeased by that noisy night.
Likewise, before getting upset with the upstairs one by the blows at midnight, maybe we should make sure that she is to blame for them.
On the other hand, if someone comes to complain about something we do and it bothers you, it does not make sense to get angry either. Whether it comes from good or bad, a good technique will be to respectfully listen to the claims and then ensure that we will take them into account, however quirky and whimsical they may be.
Teresa García-Morato
Advice: Benigno Sáez Y Antonio Crespillo
