Ideas to explain to children where babies come from
It is quite probable that any day we are at home quietly watching television, reading, cooking or walking the street with our little son and letting us loose the question "Where do children come from?". We have to be prepared and with the answers previously thought out. This moment does not have to be feared by us nor can it catch us off guard.
Experience of sexuality
Keep in mind that children under 7 years are too small to have an experience of sexuality and can not, therefore, guess that the development of your body will enable you to give life and surrender in a loving relationship. Therefore, parents can not rely on this experience as it does not yet exist. On the other hand, children perceive that the gestures of tenderness in their parents are good, that the body receives and gives love and that makes them happy.
The child acquires experience mainly because of what he sees, hence his questions arise if he sees a pregnant woman in the street, a photo, an advertisement ... Although his questions will be direct and unquestioning, we will be careful with our answers, putting a lot love and naturalness.
Language appropriate for children
The language we use is the key to helping our son solve his doubts. To do this, we have to resort to the truth and not tell fables to the little one: the storks and the acquisitions in Paris are counterproductive and also, it is lying to our son.
It is normal that we want to preserve their innocence, but that does not mean we have to resort to stories that only get the child to stay “in the clouds"And take a disconcerting surprise when some friend of yours from the school tells the truth. Our son needs real answers, but adapted to his ability to understand. The fact of having previously thought about what we are going to say will allow us to avoid confusion in the answers, that can make the child uncomfortable and make him feel like he's gotten into a taboo subject.
Possible questions and answers
It is from the age of 4, more or less, when the children will begin to ask us questions about the gestation and birth of babies. Here we offer some answers that will help the child to get an idea of what this wonderful event is about. It is real information, but adapted to his age, and when he is older, he will complete and clarify it with the help of his parents.
- Where do children come from?
Using a symbolic language, we can tell you that "Dad and mom have given each other a very strong hug, and in that hug, dad had a little seed that has joined the other that had mom, and from there grows the baby". They are still too small to talk to them with biological terms such as "ovum" or "sperm", very complicated and confusing, so these concepts will be reduced to something known by the child: he knows that life can come from the seeds, and In comparison, we can use this term to explain the development of the baby and how it reaches the mother's womb.
- And where does the little seed come in?
We will tell you that in the same place where the baby is born, a path made for him. This answer follows the same line as that of the question "Where is the baby born?".
- How does the baby live in mom's gut?
The biological term "uterus" is inadequate and does not explain to the child anything of reality. We must convey that the baby is warm, comfortable and protected by his mother. A concept known to him is "cradle": we can tell him that he is in a cradle made to the size of the baby, where he sleeps and is calm. It is an explanation as real as logical, since the child knows that the crib is a place intended for babies. It is, therefore, a very educational word that also helps the child to discover how well they are installed in the womb of their mother.
- Where does the baby eat?
We can explain to him that the baby is attached to his mother through the umbilical cord, which is like a small tube through which he receives the food that his mother gives him; something like when he drinks with a straw.
- And where is the baby born?
We will tell you that nature has planned everything for the baby and there is a special path for him in the body of the mother. We can tell you that this path is under the mother's gut and that it is reserved for the baby to pass. At this point, young children often ask if it is the same place where you urinate, it is important to clarify that it is in the same place, but it is different.
- Does it hurt when it is born?
We can say a little, but explain that it's the same as when we go to the dentist and put a "little liquid" on the gum so it does not hurt. To the mothers the doctor also gives them a medicine so that almost nothing hurts them.
The questions about the birth of babies can be many and varied, depending largely on the curiosity of the child. In any case, our role as educators is to be prepared for when these doubts arise, it is not advisable to delay and since they are very young it is convenient to tell them that babies "are born from the mother's gut". There are people who consider this type of education unnecessary, arguing that nobody explained anything to them and they have known how to move forward. However, speaking to our children about human love, affection and sexuality is essential for their complete and harmonious development.
Advice: Inès Pélissié du Rausas, author of the book Please tell me about love!
It may interest you:
- Where do children come from
- How to talk about sex education at home
- Ideas to educate children's modesty
- Sex education on examination