Friends for teenage girls: their strength and importance
During adolescence, friends become the main point of reference for our daughters. 99% of teenagers He affirms that sincerity is an essential quality of the ideal friend. The friends then become confidants, sources of information and support in bad times. Hence, its strength and importance.
The teenagers consider Friendship a priority value in your life, ahead of health and boys. For the teenagers from home, life begins to become difficult to imagine without her group of friends. Adolescents value friendship very much, granting a crucial importance to their group, which counts as an average of ten girls, according to a study conducted by Procter & Gamble on friendship among young Spanish girls.
The soul mates" they are known mostly in the school or institute and they declare to share practically everything. In this way, they rely on the bad moments, they confess the problems, they are advised on issues of boys or clothes.
It is important to note that Sincerity is the quality that can not be lacking in the ideal friend. Sincerity, trust and support in bad times are, in this order, the qualities that are expected from the friend with capital letters. They tend to want to spend with their friends, as long as possible.
Friendship gains strength among teenage girls
The friends have a lot of weight in the adolescent stage and can counterbalance the influence of the parents. It is a stage that marks the birth of true friendship. The friendships of childhood are left behind and, then, when the band of friends It becomes very important, since it offers security at the same time that it helps you become independent from your parents.
Friendships in adolescence are characterized by being fervent, exclusive, passionate, a reflection of the unstable and inconstant personality of these years. As they get older, friendship becomes more stable, the relationship is less passionate but more serene and lasting.
The school and institute is the place where friendship is forged In most cases. This percentage is higher during the first adolescence, because as they reach their birthday, friends of other origins are incorporated (university, neighborhood ...)
In the lives of these teenagers, friendship is the most mentioned priority (56%), but remains behind the family (66%). Much further are the studies and the boyfriend, who begins to charge a more relevant role after 17 years. However, as they get older, they give more importance to health and family. The study reveals that they are faithful to their friendships and that for them the change from the school / institute to the University does not mean losing their friendships but finding new friends.
What do teenage girls talk about with their friends?
Against what your parents might think, the main topic of conversation between friends in Spain are the studios, with 55%. "I'm going to suspend, but my parents can not find out." His favorite topics of conversation are the studios and the children, although they also talk about the problems at home (discussions with parents) or the anecdotes of common friends. However, despite the fact that they talk about all kinds of issues, the most reserved problems are the relatives and very intimate aspects.
From the 13 years begins to speak normally of menstruation. 44% of respondents said that they lived with their friends some aspect of the first rule and of these, 63% went to them at that time. Conversations about sex are mostly in jest, although in 13% of cases they recognize that they are concerned about sexually transmitted diseases and talk about them with their friends, which they consider the most appropriate source to learn the secrets of sexuality.
It is a curious fact to verify that most of the respondents believe that boys and girls talk about very different topics and in a different way. Thus, they consider that children's conversations revolve around more superficial issues (girls, soccer, cars, sports ...) During this stage, characterized by changes and insecurities, the friends begin to become mirrors of each other and the issues in those who claim to receive more influence of your group is, fundamentally, in clothes and boys.
A matter of trust for them and their friends
For Spanish teenagers, friendship is above all a matter of trust. "Being honest about what she thinks of you is helping you," says 14-year-old Marta.
Therefore, the lack of sincerity is the main reason why friendship can be broken and finally lost. Other factors that influence the rupture can be criticism of other friends, personality changes due to interests, etc.
The adolescent is at a stage where he does not know himself, does not know what he wants, does not control emotions and, in the face of this personal insecurity, takes refuge in the group. On the other hand, the feelings of inferiority that often accompany it are a good breeding ground to be handled by the group.
Boys and girls differ in the way they live friendship. For them, it is essential to be popular with their peers, to be famous and to be cool. Acceptance by the group is of vital importance for the adolescent and feeling rejected is a tremendous frustration at this stage of life.
Activities that adolescents share with their friends
María has discovered in her gang a series of affinities that have attracted her and have common points with which she feels comfortable. Within the group of people chosen by her, she discovers, behind adults' backs, her own experiences. "His gang represents the refuge formed by people who understand it to the fullest," says the doctor in Psychology Pilar Martín Lobo in his book Your daughter from 15 to 16 years old.
Fundamentally they dedicate to the ludic activities most of the time they spend with their friends. When they are left with them, one of the favorite activities is dancing in the clubs followed by going to the movies.
The intimacies shared by teenage friends
It is very common that they go to their friends before any other person or family to tell their intimacies. "Friends are more in your place because we are in the same age," says Raquel, 15 years old. The friend becomes the main confessor in all age groups, followed by the mother or boyfriend, depending on the case. Until the age of 16, the second position is occupied by the mother, although far from the priority role played by the friend. However, as the age progresses, the boyfriend begins to take on more importance, although always behind the friends.
Lucía Jiménez
More information in book: Your daughter from 15 to 16 years old. Author Pilar Martín Lobo
