My son has bitten another child, what do I do?
Photo: ISTOCK Enlarge photoWe get a little note from school. Our son has stuck a bite to a partner in the yard. And all the doubts come to us at once. Will it be aggressive by nature? Has there been any failure in the child's education? This attitude is more common than we think at preschool ages. And it can end.
Why does children bite
As indicated by the Center on the Social and Emotional Foundations of Early Learning at Vanderbilt University, that a boy bites It is normal, although not acceptable. This behavior can be caused by Various reasons for example:
- Frustration. The preschooler still does not master linguistic abilities or social communication rules. Not knowing how to express their strongest feelings, they resort to some actions such as the bite to let others know their mood.
- Relationship difficulties. If the child is introverted, he may feel overwhelmed by being surrounded by so many others. In these cases the little one reacts by biting others. For example, as a result of this feeling of nervousness, to see how another child urges him, to get off the swing because he finished his shift or when sharing a toy.
- Draw attention. One of the things a child who bites quickly learns is that it causes a great reaction among those around him. If sometimes the child does not receive the attention he believes he deserves, he can claim it by biting his classmates to become the center of everything.
- Imitation. Very related to the previous reason. If the child observes that another partner has received attention after being bitten. Sometimes minors can copy this way of proceeding to get everyone to pay attention to him.
How to make him stop biting
The most important thing when we see that the child bites is attend to the reasons. When parents understand what leads their child to act in this way, they can get to work in the right way. For example it will be good to check if this attack to other minors occurs when they have removed a toy or if you have bitten another for envy.
These are some techniques that the Center on the Social and Emotional Foundations of Early Learning suggests to parents to try to avoid Let your child bite:
- Teach to ask for help. Faced with the frustration that can be caused by another child removing his toy, the child must learn to ask for help from their teachers at school or from their parents if it occurs outside the school. The child must understand that this is the way to proceed and not attack by biting.
- Monitor the game. If the bite occurs when the child is playing in a group and feels overwhelmed by the presence of others, we must sit with him taking advantage of situations where parents can witness these activities. In this way you can guide the children and teach them to respect the shifts, to share and coexist among their peers.
- Teach him what is hurting. Explaining to the child the pain that can cause others with his bite is one of the techniques that work best. Make him understand that it is always better to talk than to bite and that he should not do what he would not want others to do with him.
- Small punishments. If the child has bitten to get attention, a small punishment of five minutes without playing can help you understand that having taken a bite out of others has given the opposite result to the one you were looking for.
Damián Montero
