Educational styles, what is yours?
The art of educating children is a difficult task, but at the same time beautiful and full of compensations. All parents try to do their best, but just to be better parents, good parents need to be well informed and put a lot of effort on our part.
Now we know that in our way of being and acting in the education of children many consequences that directly affect children in their behavior and behavior, in their self-esteem, in their relationships with others, in their capacity for effort and overcoming. What kind of father are you?
With what style do you identify yourself when it comes to educating?
Father Punitive. Red light
They are parents for those who everything is "no". They lose control frequently, they are aggressive, they punish excessively, they devalue the child because they believe that they can not choose or think or behave well and never see the positive of what their child does. Is all as a result, children are very resentful, emotionally affected. When they are small, the children are obedient and submissive, they repress their impulses and thoughts, but they are aggressive with the parents.
In the Social relationships are very anxious, very timid, they have many feelings of hopelessness, that is, "it has no solution, I am the bad guy of the film, what am I going to do, I am like that", they always think that they are the guilty because in reality, they blame them all the time all. If a person is raised continually telling him "do not do this", when he is a teenager and comes out into the world, he works differently and the traditional discipline will inspire rebellion.
Inconsistent FatherYellow traffic light
The traffic light in yellow brings about as many problems as the traffic light in red, because the traffic light in yellow means that I do not know if it is "yes" or I do not know if it is "no". For example, Juan is playing ball in the living room. "Juan, do not play the ball there you can break something." Juan keeps playing ball in the living room. "Juan, did not I tell you that you do not play in the living room?" Juan continues. "Juan, please, do not play in the room." Juan continues. And finally, Juan breaks the vase. Then the mother decides to remove the valuables from the living room and the next day Juan will play at his ease.
They are parents who let themselves be guided by their emotional state. The inconsistent parents are parents with ambivalent feelings, They love their children, but at times they want to kill them, they can not stand them anymore and they are looking forward to the weekend at the grandmother's house. Reinforce and punish the same behavior depending on your mood.
In this example, the mother of Juan is not clear if it is right or wrong to play football in the living room of the house and if it is clear, it is unclear how to make it clear to Juan. And, as a result, we find children who do not learn adapted behaviors, who do not know how to solve problems, therefore, or do not give importance to a serious problem or drown in a glass of water and a problem seems a problem; he is inhibited and ambivalent, they are insecure, they are fearful, they do not have social skills because they do not know what to expect.
Father Indulgent Green traffic light.
The traffic light in green: "do what you wantI'm tired, if you do not want to eat, do not eat, if you do not want to bathe, do not bathe, do not brush your teeth, and when your teeth fall, it's your problem, not mine. "When inappropriate behavior occurs that demands a limit, the limit does not come, the threat comes.
If one verbally threatens that they are going to do things that they do not fulfill, in reality the child learns the message: "I speak but I do not act". Finally, what we have is a child absolutely tyrant of the home; decide what to do, how to do it and when to do it. Then, the parents are their slaves. They are inconsiderate and selfish, and they are plaintiffs, they do not cooperate, they are antisocial.
This frequently appears linked to the same discourse: "What happens is that I can give him what he wants and I did not have all this, and now that I can and I'm doing well, I want to spend it on my son, and if he likes another game, I do not cost anything and I buy it. " However, it is good for the child to learn to expect gratification because life is that; he has to learn to wait. Every time we, by omission, do not put a limit we take a step back.
Ignacio Iturbe
